Given that women are quite mysterious, the question, ‘What is it that women like in bed?’ has been one to trouble men for past generations. There is no consensus on the matter, what gives a particular woman pleasure is likely to irritate the other. Regardless of the difficulty one faces in trying to discover what women like in bed, and how to make her have a happy climax, there are myths that we know for sure that is wrong on the topic. Relationship specialist, Tamar Gass, reveals to us 10 things that women want men to know about sex.
There are particular days in a month when women are fertile and hence, have a higher sex drive during that period. On the contrary, men are fertile all day. While a man gets signals from his brain telling him he wants to have sex all time, the woman only yearns for sex when she’s ovulating. On every other day, her sex urge depends mainly on her social interactions. That doesn’t mean that women only want sex when they are ovulating, it just means that they will crave it more on those days.
Almost all men believe that a hard penis turns a woman on. And that by guiding her hands to your penis or poking her when it’s hard, you will get her aroused. A hard penis only means one thing, that you are aroused, not her. You will have to do more than guiding her hand to it or asking her to play with it if you want to get her attention. And you will be disappointed to think that you deserve to have sex just because you have an erection.
The clean skin, the perfect butt and boobs, the rhythm in the movement, the moaning, the size of the penis, the duration of sex, the cum sucking etc. all these things as much as they appeal to the senses are nothing but, you guessed right… fake. Porn industries are there primarily for entertainment. They are made to appeal to your fantasies. Real-life sex is, well… real! It is nothing like what you watch online. The pornography we watch online is channelled towards getting us addicted, which you know, is good for business; but that is a topic for another time. If you are trying so hard to recreate what you saw online in the bedroom, you will miss what gives her pleasure.
Honestly, men tend to be okay after their first climax but that’s not the same for women. During intercourse, the vagina muscles contracts rapidly, gripping the penis. After her first climax, the vagina released fluid and gets tighter, which in turn makes the activity more enjoyable.
The location of the clitoris is not just the protrusion of flesh on the top of the vagina, it can also be found inside, around the walls of the vagina, like legs split in two in an inverted V. The point where the two legs of the inner clitoris converge is the G-spot (inside, about 2-3 inches on the top side). The G-spot becomes erect during foreplay and can only be reached when erect. The erection is as a result of high blood flow when the female is aroused. The G-spot becomes more prominent during or immediately after she reaches orgasm.
The importance of foreplay cannot be overemphasized. To most persons, a passionate foreplay is better than penetration. Foreplay also prepares her before sex. He must try not to make it about himself by distracting her with his penis, instead, he must try to get her aroused and her clitoris erect. This is because an erect clitoris brings about pleasure in the vagina, that way she will likely climax which means that she will make him hard for penetration again since it’s a lot easier for the man to get an erection. You can tell if she enjoyed the sex by how well you spent time to get her aroused during foreplay.
Here again, lies the danger of watching porn, the expectation you develop about the duration of sex. you don’t have to keep penetrating for a long time for her to climax. If she’s unable to climax within 10mins, she may not be able to, no matter how long you penetrate. Foreplay should take longer than the main sex. You should also make effort to find out what gives her maximum pleasure, so you will know what to focus on. That way you won’t spend a large chunk of time doing the undesired.
In positions that put most of her weight on her legs, it is quite difficult for her to reach orgasm. It will be more difficult for her to climax in a standing position, in a doggy position or when she is riding on top of you.
Being wet and being erect is entirely different. The latter is much more important. The female erection takes a lot more than sound, slight touching, feeling or just thought unlike in the male when the above mentioned brings about an erection. Erection in the female takes quite a lot more. The clitoral erection in the female can be achieved by rubbing the clitoris on the outside (you are to vary the paces as she pleases). You must be intentional about giving her an erection, as this is the first phase of her getting an orgasm.
Men need to learn to take subtle signals from women. If she appears to be rushing you through it or scream it’s a lot for her to handle or somehow reaches climax without foreplay, then there’s a big chance she’s not enjoying it hence the need to fake it.
She might also fake so that the activities will stop, as she is either tired or frustrated. Education and understanding your partner’s desires, interests and feelings will help bridge the climax-gap between the two of you and will hopefully allow both of you to enjoy sex more.
LoveWorks has ideas to make foreplay more fun. Oral sex can be improved with your partner’s favorite flavored oil, such as Raspberry Kiss, giving them two satisfactory experiences at the same time. Pre-sex time can be improved with games that are designed to relax and slow the entry into the sex act. Sex Toys can be added to bring about climax or orgasm in the female before the sex act actually begins. Even males who might be adverse to large toys do not object to the use of a small and inexpensive vibrating bullet, or a top-of-the-line bullet.
Making sex better takes a little time, and sometimes a little help. Ask a store team member for more ideas on improving her loving time!
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