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4 Helpful Tips On How To Prepare For Anal Sex

We have anal sex tips and tricks!

This article is continued from:  5 Tips On How Does A Butt Plug Work

How to prepare for ANAL SEX:

TIP #1:  READ what we have to say.  You might find your experiences better if you know what is ahead (or behind!).

I am skipping the most important tip:  talking with your partner about anal play and making sure each of you understand the “rules, boundaries and limitations” (to quote my friend Caesar Milan).

I am also skipping the second tip on “How to Get Ready for Anal Sex” (which we find that many people in real life skip anyway) — PREPARE for anal play with an anal enema.  Our customers tell us they skip this part because they are already into sex and foreplay when they decide to experiment with anal play.  But if you really want to do this correctly, a soapy-water enema can help to remove what is in your anal canal.  Unfortunately, this is what most people will see on their penis (or their partner’s penis) because when lube mixes with existing … “stuff” … the situation gets messy.  The current “polite” word being used is “mud” – as in “After anal sex, I had mud on my condom”.

I am also skipping the condom issue.  Yes, “how to prepare for anal sex” includes condoms: you should wear a condom during anal intercourse with any partner.  Yes, you should wear a finger cot (“finger condom”) when digitally fingering the anus.  Remember, better safe than sorry.  [Also, some guys have unusually sensitive Urethras and anal sex without a condom will often result in a trip to the doctor for an infection].  We sell finger condoms (finger cots) online and in our stores, but you can get five times as many for the same price if you purchase them at Albertsons or Kroger.

Ok, so now you understand the different types and levels of anal sex-play, there are a dozen more questions that we answer when we are talking about these toys and How to Prepare for Anal Sex.

How do I get started?  Do I use the toy first?  Should I start with fingers?  How much lube do I use?  Should I use silicone or water-based lube?  Do I want a thicker lube like KY or a thinner one like Astroglide?  What do I do if I can’t relax and it hurts?  How long is long enough to wear an anal plug?  Is there going to be poo-poo on the toy when I remove it?  Should I put a condom on the toy?  What is the best position to start — on my stomach, on my knees with my head up, with my head on the pillow  or on my back with my legs spread?

And those are just some of the questions we hear.  There is no way to address them all in this post, but I will do my best to get the important ones so that you feel you are ready and understand how to prepare for anal sex.

TIP #2:  ANAL LUBE:  We should start with what I consider to be the most important anal accessory ever — good anal how to get ready for anal sexlube.  There is a product that we sell in the stores that we have nick-named “Anal Morphine”.  The lube is called “Anal Glide Extra” and is the best product we have ever had or sold to desensitize the anus.  Although not a necessity, having a “Shooter” is a a great accessory for all anal lubes including anal glide.

how to get ready for anal sexWe explain that the receiving partner should grab each check and spread their ass, while the anal glide is slowly poured and worked into the secret highway, past the first sphincter, and slowly past the second sphincter.  There needs to be anal glide lube from the outer edges of the anus to the area all the way at the base of the inside muscles.

A good description is to “wipe it around the asshole then push it in the tunnel”.  There is no such thing as using too much anal desensitizer!  Many people do tell us however, that they notice a slight burn in the first minute that the lube enters their anal passage.  That feeling dissipates quickly and is considered normal.

It takes less than 30 minutes for the numbing effects to be noticed — so do something else during these 30 minutes (foreplay, kissing, etc.).  It is not just a desensitizer — it is a lube you can use with your fingers and toys and will help to continue the desensitization making anal play easier to accept and enjoy.

Anal play will hurt more if you do not relax.  Deep breaths, the desire to “WANT” to experience anal sex, and a patient, loving, slow moving partner.  Information is the key — knowing how to prepare for anal sex will make your first time one that you want to repeat.

A customer wrote:  “Come on.  When you are trying to have anal sex with your partner for the first anal sex requires relaxationtime, it is no different than being with a virgin.  And most guys aren’t patient or gentle with virgins either.  Part of the problem is that the slower a guy moves, the less friction and stimulation he has and the more likely he will lose his erection.  Ask guys about taking the virginity of a girl, and they will tell you they “lost” their erection a few times and wondered why some people rave about taking the virginity of a girl because it was too much work!  Anal sex for the first time is the SAME.”

Those comments are quite true and very appreciated.  Guys need stimulation to maintain the erection and spending too much time at the entrance without being able to cross the thresh-hold is more than some guys can handle.  But if you have prepped your partner’s anus, then there shouldn’t be that much waiting.

anal trainers and dilatorsA few minutes after applying the desensitizer, slow insert one finger (preferably with a finger cot/finger condom).  Work the finger in slowly and allow your partner to adjust.  As you feel relaxation, try two fingers.  Repeat the process and try for 3 fingers in the anus.  Once you have 3 fingers in, your partner should be dilated enough for a cock to make entry.

One of the other big benefits of finger condoms, is that after you have worked to dilate and relax the anus, you can THROW AWAY the condom; you do not need to stop and leave the bed to wash your finger.

We sell quite a few anal toys called “anal dilators” or “anal trainers” and they are very helpful in learning to receive anal intercourse.  To use, start with the smaller dilator, lube and insert.  Allow to relax, and after a while, remove and insert the next size, working your way to the largest of the dilators.

Remember that the length of the toy takes time to get used to as well as the girth.  Go slow, and allow the anus to adjust.  THE MOST COMMON complaint about anal sex is the pain associated with insertion.  This pain is caused by the anal rings (sphincters) being very tight and not being stretched.  Using butt plugs or anal dilators of varying sizes will help.  Sleeping with the anal toys in place will also make anal intercourse easier and more relaxed.



You can try a few different positions for anal intercourse, and some may feel substantially better than others.  After a few tries, you will find what you like — and those positions will become your “go-to” anal position.

You can stand, and be bent over, such as bent over the side of your bed, with your upper body laying on top of pillows. You can reach behind you and spread your cheeks, or not.

Or get on the bed, on your knees, with your chest resting on pillows.  Others with more experience than me say that this position, with your butt in the air, and legs spread, is one of the easiest to be penetrated.  It also allows for access to genital stimulation.

get ready for anal sexHowever, in my personal experience, the easiest position to receive anal penetration is to lie flat on your stomach, or on a wedge pillow if you have one.  By being flat (or on a wedge pillow), you have NO stress to the muscles as you are not putting pressure on your knees or stomach muscles or anything. This position allows for more relaxation.  You can help your partner considerably by spreading your butt cheeks at the time of insertion.wedge pillow liberator

Preferred positions once you have had a few successful encounters, will be on your back with your ankles pushed back to your head.  The wedge pillow mentioned earlier is great here as well, probably even more so than the previous position.  Some women find that pulling the knees to their chest instead of ankles to the head is a much more rewarding position.  This is the part of sex experimentation that you must determine what your partner prefers.

Take your time.  Know what is going to happen and relax.  Everything you do is “uncomfortable” the first time so don’t rush or run away.  Make sure your partner is ready and patient to make this a valuable and satisfying first experience.

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