Masturbation Should NOT be a Dirty Secret. It’s Good for Us!

masturbation is good for us

Although pleasure is understandably the easier answer to give as to why we go solo, there is a lot more to benefit from the act of masturbation than we were ever told.

Having a mastery of your spots and areas can be very healthy, mentally and physically. It can also improve your relationships and overall well being.

Masturbation benefits for physical health

Getting freaky alone is what makes us feel good by relieving sexual tension. It also eliminates the worries of unwanted pregnancy and risk of Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). No worries about broken condoms or ineffective contraceptives or its usage, are additional benefits of doing it alone.

It also serves well when you are not ready to go into a relationship, or still at the ‘talking stage’ of a new one.

Self-strokers reported that solo play is an effective way to relieve stress. The “self-pleasure report”, a research done in 2019 by an adult toy company, asked people to rate fourteen (14) different activities according to how effectively they help to alleviate stress.

The result showed that masturbation came second while sex was rated number one and sleep came along as number three. Blogging or “journaling” was last. That’s right, Dear diary!

It has been discovered that in general, frequent orgasms reduce blood pressure levels greatly. By going on frequent solo plays, we are more likely to discover our domains and spots. This renders a better understanding of our needs and we are more confident communicating it to our partner during sex. This will, in turn, boost our relationships and sex life.

Masturbation benefits for mental health

Getting freaky with oneself has some real mental benefits as well.

According to renowned sexologist, Megan Andelloux, “Masturbation can be a self-soothing behaviour that calms down our minds […] gets us in touch with our bodies, and gives us time to focus on ourselves instead of worrying about what others think”.

She mentioned that at some point growing up, some people were shamed or rebuked when seen masturbating. If they grow up thinking that masturbation is unhealthy, then later along the line, they wouldn’t be comfortable having those discussions with their kids.

The cultural uneasiness associated with the topic of self-pleasing is further magnified by some nonsense myths. We’d be shaking pretty hairy hands if masturbation did result in hairy palms or stunted growth. And rest-assured you really can’t overdo yourself either.

According to Andelloux, truly, going solo is safe provided it doesn’t disturb one’s relationships or regular daily life, and also you don’t get chafed seriously. Not only is it safe, but it’s also good.

If you are still unsure as to whether or not you should be the life of your party, the way to find out is to get closer to the pole. #wink

Dancing with yourself

With these seven steps for solo-play, you might want to get to the action

Set aside quality personal time

Anytime is a good time to make oneself feel good, so you don’t want to get stuck trying to find the ‘right time’. You just need to be sure you are not going to be distracted or rushed. For example, you wouldn’t want a friend or roommate interrupting. It’s a one-man parade.

Select a space for your solo romp

Privacy is a major consideration is choosing a place. Your comfort can also be an additive, you might want to take matters into your own hands in a bathroom (although that is frowned upon in some places so it’s not a good idea).

We are left with our beds and abundant pillows or in steamy bathtubs or shower. Point is the right environment will ease your mind into perfect headspace needed for self-play.

The Me-time mood sets

Good tunes, scented candles, dim lights, beautiful colors- whatever you need to put out distraction, put you in the right frame and bring you into the moment. Make effort to provide a loathing free atmosphere.

Absorb some sexy time media

Porn or erotica of any kind can help put you in the right mood or turn things on. You must note that they’re not a necessity for a pleasing experience. Yet, because of the imagination they arouse in our minds, they can be as potent as a stimulant.

Take off your clothes

You don’t need sexy lingerie to turn yourself on. For the most part, if you have any difficulty masturbating, you might need to get comfortable with your body for a start.

Take your time to admire and appreciate your body in its total nudity. If you happen to feel insecure about your own body, try to fixate your mind on the features you admire most on your body. Else you might opt to focus your mind on the things your body can do that you enjoy. Hint: your body provides you with pleasure.

Yes, Touch yourself

Don’t be biased, start exploring your body like a novice. Do it with ignorance. Try to find out what pleases you (not just one thing!) – alter the pressure as you like, the rate of your strokes, grabbing when necessary etc. while relishing the sensations you feel.

Don’t fixate on orgasm

It’s pointless to pressure yourself to reach orgasm when there is plenty of benefits health-wise to reap just from arousing your spots. Fixating on orgasm will make you ignore the many pleasures along the way and may have you feeling bad after you orgasm. So why worry about the end when the goal is on the way?


While there is variation from person to person, and there is no wrong or right way to do it, what is required is that you find out what works for you and enjoy it as much as you can. Well, one thing you can be sure of is self-pleasuring masturbation is safe.

Also, it is good for us, physically, mentally and overall well being. There is no need to be ashamed of giving yourself some “me-time”.   

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