What Are Most People’s Thoughts During Sex?

thoughts during sex

I have compared my thoughts during sex with some of my friends and what they think about and what I think about during sex is completely different.  But I have only asked guys, none of the girls I know would probably give me the real truth about their thoughts during sex!

I NEVER think of the girl of the girl I'm with.  I need all the help I can to come (I wish I could cum fast like my friends "complain" about) so I'm always thinking about some other girl; maybe someone I got with already or maybe someone that is just so hot that the thought of being with her really does it for me.  Its embarrassing, but the nastier the thoughts, the better chance I will have of making an orgasm.

All my guy friends say that their thoughts during sex are about NON sexual stuff because they are trying not to cum.  One buddy said he thinks about the work he wants to do on his car, and another said he thinks about the WOW game he plays.  One of my buddies laughed at my thoughts during sex and said that if he did that he would cum before he got started.

So what do other people think about – guys or girls, it doesn't matter.  Are they always thinking about the person they are having sex with, like it says in all the romantic suggestion books?

—– Tom from Dallas



  • Wow.  I didn't expect such a detailed question for the first one! But thanks!!! I'm happy to see this.  

    You are right about people not admitting what they are thinking about.  Because our minds wander, and we don't always have control about where they wander.  And we aren't going to admit to our partner what was in our mind at that very moment.  Especially since we had no control over what goes through our minds at any time.

    Our minds, the thought process that plays images and scenes back to us like a TIVO, is an amazing thing.  It is much better than your computer or internet, because it is private and CAN'T be hacked!  No one can know what is flashing across your "mental picture theater" unless you tell them.  So it is a safe place to escape.

    For example, I love my husband to death.  I can't imagine a day without him.  But my brain captures images of hot guys in every day activity, and saves them for when I need a orgasmic boost.  It is not that I "want them", and I know they could never provide what my husband provides, but I look in public and appreciate them for their physical attributes.  And my mind plays it back when I need it most.

    But as I said earlier, we can't control our mental TIVO.  And sometimes it process and presents thoughts and scenes that are not our first choice.  Like when I'm in a particular sexual position, I often think about how much fat I've gained.  Or the times when I'm exhaused and I'm guilty of thinking that I wish he would hurry and finish.

    I never know what will flash across my mind during sex … and I guess that makes it more interesting.  And I would never admit to everything I just thought!!

  • Lizzy

    I think that both women and men think about other things and other people off and on when having sex with someone even if they love them. I think it is rediculous to think that people's minds would be constantly focus on only one thing at a time even while having sex.

  • Paul

    The goal for the ladies during sex is release;  then relaxation, letting go. The goal for guys is restraint. Slow down or stop, think about something else, not yet not yet not yet.   This question made me think of the meme where the couple is having sex and the man stops in mid stroke.  The woman asks, "What are you doing? Why did you stop?"  And the man answers, "I saw this on pornotube, It is called buffering".  Actually what we are doing is stopping all movement because we realize we are at the point of no return!!!   You know, for many people, the sex is over when the guy comes. People usually don't keep going into other activities or start over after that. 

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